friends / san francisco — Comments Off on The Castro, the Mission, and Petaluma
25
May 15

The Castro, the Mission, and Petaluma

My east coast friends don’t often have the chance to come to the Bay Area. So when my friend Yiannis said he was coming for a wedding in Petaluma, I was thrilled.

Flore

We met at this cute place in the Castro for brunch. He was on New York time so he was starving. I wasn’t but I still pigged out, promptly falling off the diet wagon. I had a “sausage scramble,” which had goat cheese in addition to sausage, with a side of potatoes and a mocha. It was all delicious.

Graffiti, San Francisco style

We weren’t heading out to the wedding until later that afternoon so we had time to walk around. Yiannis used to live in the area and wanted to show me his old haunts. Along the way we saw plenty of cool graffiti:

Plus, cactus leaves for sale!

Mission Dolores Basilica

We also had time to visit the Mission Dolores Basilica, which even after six years of living in the Bay Area, I never visited. The stained glass was beautiful:

And the garden out back was lovely:

A post shared by yonkey (@yonkey) on

La Taqueria

After all that walking, we got hungry again and stopped at this awesome place in the Mission. I got a quesadilla, but it was way bigger than I expected, and I only finished half. Yiannis, on the other hand, plowed through three tacos and three (count ‘em) THREE beverages:

A post shared by yonkey (@yonkey) on

Not judging.

Petaluma

The drive out took longer than expected because of the traffic. I loved seeing another part of the area. It was beautiful in a way but quite dry of course due to the drought.

The ceremony was scheduled to start at four, and we got there at 4:20. D’oh! Luckily for us, they were having a late start, as a lot of weddings do, and we didn’t miss a thing.

It was an absolutely beautiful day. Instead of cloudy and foggy, it was sunny and warm-ish for a change. During the ceremony I saw a hummingbird hover over a pot of flowers. Later Yiannis’s friend said she saw one land on their archway as she and her wife took their vows.

The hors d’oeuvres were yummy and I enjoyed half a glass of chardonnay, and half a glass of champagne, as evinced by my red face:

A post shared by yonkey (@yonkey) on

Everyone I talked to was delightful, especially Yiannis’s friend, but except for this drunk woman who cornered us and proceeded to tell the same story about ten times in a row, and kept insisting that Yiannis go to her house for a home-cooked Mexican meal despite his saying that he was leaving early the next morning.

But all in all, it was such a lovely wedding, and such a nice visit with my friend.

what i've been watching — Comments Off on More ’80s Movies Redux: ‘Better off Dead’
30
Apr 15

More ’80s Movies Redux: ‘Better off Dead’

betteroffdeadFor a few posts now I’ve mentioned wanting to watch Better Off Dead. The other night, I finally got my fix.

But unlike The Sure Thing and The Breakfast Club, and like Pretty in Pink, the movie is much worse than I remember.

Better off Dead came out the same year as The Sure Thing, and as always John Cusack is hilarious. (He was only 16 or 17 when the movies were made.) But unlike The Sure Thing, which is a simple focused story, Dead is all over the place.

As a kid I read a review that called the film “uneven,” and uneven it is. It’s as though it can’t decide what kind of movie it wants to be. Romantic teen comedy? Slapstick? The Karate Kid but with skiing? All three? And let’s throw in some animated burgers and cheesy saxophone playing while we’re at it.

Lloyd (Cusack) and Monique (Diane Franklin who, by the way, isn’t really French) each have too much going on too. Lloyd can ski, play the sax, and draw. Monique is a tomboy who likes the Brooklyn Dodgers (which by the way had been the Los Angeles Dodgers since the 1950s), knows car repair, and effortlessly skis the most difficult ski slope, the one that plagues Lloyd and puts the ski shop owner in traction.

While Williams and of course Cusack are youthful, the actors who play Beth and Roy look about 25.

However, there’s no denying that Dead is a beloved classic (although not beloved by Cusack himself apparently), especially for those of us who grew up with cable and watched it five billion times. Every ’80s kid knows the catchphrases, if not whole swathes of dialogue, by heart.

“French…fries. . .French…dressing. . .French..bread.”

“Christmas…Christmas…!”

“I’m really sorry your mom blew up, Ricky.”

“He’s skiing on one ski!”

And of course, “I want my two dollars!”

If only there were no sax playing or romantic ski duet.

what i've been watching — Comments Off on More ’80s Redux: ‘Tootsie’ and ‘The Sure Thing’
23
Apr 15

More ’80s Redux: ‘Tootsie’ and ‘The Sure Thing’

SureThing_817Ever since rewatching The Breakfast Club, I’ve been on an ’80s kick, at least where movies are concerned. So earlier this week at my parents’ house with Netflix for some reason not working on my iPad, I settled for Amazon Prime and YouTube instead and watched for the billion time two ’80s classics: Tootsie and The Sure Thing.

Tootsie

Dustin Hoffman’s female-impersonation vehicle, I’m happy to say, still holds up. On a recent episode of The Americans, a couple of characters see the movie and the one from Russia says, “That would never happen in the Soviet Union.” The American answers, “That would never happen here either.”

And it’s true. While the film is hilarious and great storytelling, “Dorothy” is clearly a man in drag. There’s no way that absolutely everyone would be fooled.

But all the actors are wonderful, and although I’ve seen it so many times, I still laughed out loud at certain parts, like when Julie, flustered by Dorothy’s advances, answers the phone but picks up a corn cob instead.

“That’s a corn cob,” Dorothy says.

Or when a dejected Michael watches a mime “balancing” on the curb for a few minutes before pushing him over.

I also love that Bill Murray plays straight man second fiddle to Hoffman. You kind of forget that it’s Bill Murray. I read in the IMDb trivia that he agreed to omit his name from the opening credits so that audiences wouldn’t expect something like Caddyshack or Meatballs.

Some other takeaways: Dabney Coleman plays sleazy very well, and Terri Garr was rather Jennifer Aniston-esque, or rather Aniston is Terri Garr-esque.

The Sure Thing

As I said in my Breakfast Club post, I’ve been obsessed lately with 1980s John Cusack.

While I was really in the mood for Better Off Dead (as a short dark-haired Chinese girl, I always identified with the short dark-haired French girl), I only now just found that it’s available for free on YouTube, so I made do with The Sure Thing (also free on YouTube).

While there are a few very ’80s aspects about the movie — the music for one as well as the guys’ short shorts — it holds up well. Cusack was only 17 during filming and Daphne Zuniga was four years his senior, but they’re a good match and have good chemistry. While Zuniga’s character is supposed to be uptight, I actually love her preppy L.L Bean outfits, which unlike Cusack’s turned up collars and rolled up shirt-jacket sleeves, don’t seem dated.

But enough about the clothes. I’m always a sucker for a good meet-cute and two characters who hate each other but end up falling in love, and that’s what Gib and Allison are. What makes The Sure Thing well above average is that Gib and Allison have convincing character arcs as well — not only do they fall in love, they change, which makes the falling in love possible.

Next up in my ’80s queue are Better Off Dead, One Crazy Summer, Moonstruck, and 9 to 5.

boston / travel — Comments Off on Beantown Birthday
22
Apr 15

Beantown Birthday

This past week or so I’ve been on my annual east coast birthday trip.

While I usually visit New York, this time I felt like doing something different, namely visiting my pal Ellen in Boston.

Getting There

While I got my tickets to New Jersey pretty early, I hemmed and hawed for the longest time about how I’d get to Boston from New Jersey. Flying seemed inexpensive but I hated the idea of going to the airport so many times within a 10-day period. The bus is super-cheap, but my back hurts if I sit too long. That left the train, which is pretty expensive and takes as long as the bus.

But then I hemmed and hawed for so long that the plane tickets ended up being too expensive, and I took the train anyway.

The four hours didn’t feel long at all. It helped that I had no one next to me so I was able to spread out; that there was free wifi that worked (well, mostly); and that we actually got to Boston on time.

Since it was only about three, I headed over to Ellen’s workplace. Our other buddy, Aki, had come in the night before so she was already there. While Ellen finished up some work, Aki and I snacked, spaced out, and browsed our phones.

After we headed out, we almost immediately we ran into one of my must-sees:

Hello Mr. Poe #edgarallanpoe #boston

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

When I saw the statue from far away, I admit I was a little disappointed that it was “small.” But actually upon closer inspection, I loved that it’s street level and person-sized.

Me and Mr. Poe #edgarallanpoe #boston A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

Next we strolled through the Boston Common and then down Newbury and Boylston Streets, eventually ending up at the marathon finish line.

At the finish line, pre-race #boston #bostonmarathon

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

I wouldn’t be going to the race so I was glad to at least see where it ended.

That night we had a yummy Italian dinner at this place called Vinny’s in Somerville. From the outside it looked a little hole-in-the-wall-ish, but the food was really good. We shared a few dishes: a calamari salad, the stuffed calamari, the Sicilian rabbit, and a side of angel hair pasta. Everything was delicious but I especially liked the rabbit (very tender and not gamey at all) and the angel hair.

Museum, cider, and ramen

The next day was packed with activities. We spent the morning visiting various food shops (two bakeries, a Greek grocery, and a cheese shop) before heading out to the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum, which, Aki found out, was free if it was your birthday, which on that day it was.

It’s been many years since I’ve been at the Isabella Stewart. I was glad to see the new wing — isabellastewartgardner — and the old courtyard, as lovely as always —

Courtyard #isabellastewartgardner #boston A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

After the museum, we hit a couple of hard cider tastings. I’ve never had hard cider before, and it turns out I like it. The first was at at Bantam Cider —

bantamcider

— and the second was at Downeast, which was out on the docks. After a bunch of cider, I was feeling sassy:

Being sassy at the cider bar #boston #downeast

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

We capped off the day with a late dinner at Santouka Ramen in Harvard Square, another Aki find. Apparently Santouka is a well-known chain in Japan. I got something with a little kick:

Long spicy noodles for a long spicy life.

Maine

On Sunday we drove up to Ogunquit, Maine.

While it was freezing (luckily Ellen had a winter coat in her trunk for me to borrow), it was absolutely beautiful. We took a walk down the rocky shore —

Rocky Maine coast #maine #ogunquit #atlanticocean

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

— and had a seafood lunch. My buds had lobster rolls and lobster stew while I had clam chowder (I also had an excellent hot dog when we first got there). We also saw a lighthouse:

Cape Neddick Light #maine #capeneddick #lighthouse A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

It was so lovely just to walk around, get lots of sun, and breathe in the fresh salt air.

By the end of the day, we were pooped. We had dinner at a Mexican place near Ellen’s apartment — shredded pork, yum! — and then crashed.

And back home

The train back to New York was a bit more crowded and about 15 minutes late, but I managed to get some work done in between dozing off. An upside to getting into Penn Station was that I could just run across the platform to catch another train back to my parents’.

Since Monday I’ve been catching up with work and being a lazy bum. On Thursday I head back to San Francisco.

reviews / what i'm reading now — Comments Off on Review: Gwendolyn, by Diana Souhami
12
Apr 15

Review: Gwendolyn, by Diana Souhami

gwendolynWarning: lots of spoilers.

First I want to admit I haven’t read George Eliot since high school. But I remember enjoying Silas Marner and Middlemarch so when I had the chance to read historian Diana Souhami’s Gwendolyn, which is based on a character in another one of Eliot’s novels, Daniel Deronda, I snatched it up.

At first I thought I had made a huge mistake.

The book starts off slowly, probably much in the style of Eliot and not in a style that I’m used to reading as of late. It didn’t help that I had just finished Gina Frangello’s A Life in Men, which was fan-fucking-tastic. So Gwendolyn, Souhami’s first foray into fiction, had a lot to live up to.

Something else that got on my nerves at first was Gwen’s referring to Deronda as “you” throughout the book. I understand that the novel is in the form of a letter, but all the you’s got pretty tedious after a while, especially in the scenes with Deronda, who seemed like a high and mighty killjoy if you ask me.

But then something happened. Deronda left the picture, and the book got a whole lot more interesting.

Every single other character was a hell of a lot more interesting than Deronda, from Gwen herself, to her cruel and sadistic husband, Grandcourt, to the unique and artistic friends she makes post-marriage, to George Eliot herself, who while a celebrated author is also nosy, judgmental, and insecure.

The story of Gwen’s marriage to Grandcourt is horrific yet gripping, and I found myself rooting for her escape and, afterward, her growth and freedom without rescue from a “prince.”

I also kept anxiously waiting for Grandcourt to show up on her doorstep, alive and well, since his body, post-drowning, never washed up on shore. But as Gwen gained strength and confidence, in addition to her new circle of friends, I was less anxious, not that Grandcourt wouldn’t show, but because I thought she could handle herself if he did.

The sign of well-done historical fiction for me is when while I’m reading or immediately afterward, I look up all the “characters.” That happened with The Paris Wife and it happened with Gwendolyn.

Right after I finished I looked up George Eliot to find out more about her longtime companion George Lewes, with whom she had an open relationship although she liked to be called Mrs. Lewes, and after his death, her marriage to a man 20 years her junior — in the book, it’s said she called him her “nephew,” weird — who during their honeymoon in Venice “jumped from their hotel balcony into the Grand Canal.” (He survived.)

Another “real” character is Paul Leroy, a French painter who lives with his probable-lover Antoine. Julian, a trapeze artist who cross-dresses as Juliette, might be based on the “female impersonator, high-wire performer” Barbette, who, like Julian, was born in Texas (although many years after Julian would have been) and performed in drag, only revealing himself as male at the end of his performance. That could be a whole book in and of itself.

Overall I enjoyed the book, and think that fans of Eliot and especially Daniel Deronda will enjoy it even more.

what i've been watching — Comments Off on Rewatching ‘The Breakfast Club’: Some Takeaways
04
Apr 15

Rewatching ‘The Breakfast Club’: Some Takeaways

MSDBRCL EC016I recently rewatched The Breakfast Club (purely for research, I swear).

While it’ll always be my favorite John Hughes movie (Sixteen Candles has a bit too much broad humor for me and Pretty in Pink just doesn’t hold up well), I couldn’t help but be bothered, and also surprised, by some things.

Bender’s verbal assault and sexual harassment of Claire. Or perhaps verbal and sexual assault?

It’s well-known that Judd Nelson stayed in character and continued to abuse Molly Ringwald when the cameras stopped rolling. While Ringwald “knew what he was doing” and so wasn’t bothered by the terrorizing, John Hughes was “fiercely protective” of her and almost had Nelson fired.

What’s extra disturbing is that Claire ends up with Bender, which is what we all wanted as teenagers, but now I worry that the abuse wouldn’t have ended, and might have gotten worse.

Ah adulthood, ruining everything.

I forgot how cute Emilio Estevez was. He was truly the nice guy in the movie, and for the billionth time, I was glad when Ally Sheedy’s Allison ended up with his Andrew Clark.

Ally Sheedy and Anthony Michael Hall are really good in this. So are the others but those two especially. And Hall was only 15 when shooting started!

I identify much more with Allison now than before. When I was younger, I probably wanted to distance myself from someone like her, but now that I’m older, I really admire her, dandruff, purse full of tampons, and all.

How did the library not reek of pot smoke? And while we’re at it, wouldn’t have the principal noticed the broken glass of the language lab?

I’m now obsessed with imagining John Cusack as Bender. Apparently John Cusack was close to getting the role of Bender. Ringwald said Cusack was great but different, “funnier and more sly and cute,” and, it seems, “not enough of a dick.”

Now I can’t stop imagining an alternate Breakfast Club universe with a cute, funny, sly Cusack version of Bender, rather than the scary and dangerous Nelson. I guess I’ll have to make do with One Crazy Summer, Better Off Dead, The Sure Thing, and Say Anything, all of which I guess I’ll have to rewatch as well.

obsessions — Comments Off on Obsessed: Stuff You Should Know
15
Mar 15

Obsessed: Stuff You Should Know

StuffYouShouldKnowWhile I’ve been a longtime fan of This American Life, I’ve never really been into podcasts. I wasn’t against them, but I just never gave them much thought. Then came Serial, and everything changed.

But after 12 short weeks, Serial was over, and I felt like I had nothing to listen to on my longish commute to and from work. This American Life is only once a week, and there are only so many times I can listen to the same 100 songs on my phone.

Somewhere along the way it suddenly occurred to me that there were probably a gazillion free podcasts out there for me to listen to. However, a gazillion is a lot, and I had no idea how to get started.

Then I happened upon this article in Mental Floss about noteworthy podcasts. Jackpot! I tried a bunch, and while I like Criminal and Here’s the Thing (Alec Baldwin has his own podcast, who knew?), what I really like is Stuff You Should Know.

Some of you might know I love trivia about random stuff (someday I’m writing a book called The History of Random Shit — you’d buy it, right?), and that’s exactly what SYSK is. The hosts are Josh Clarke and Chuck Bryant, two normal dudes who happen to be interested in a lot of different things. They’re also pretty hilarious.

I don’t know how many episodes I’ve listened to so far, but I’ve gone way back to the beginning when the podcasts were super short, ie, less than 20 minutes. Now they’re about 40 minutes, give or take, and include more banter and off-topic meandering, which I actually kind of like. For instance, one or both of them almost always ends up mentioning some movie that reminds them of the topic, and I end up jotting down the movie to watch later.

I’ve enjoyed all the episodes, but here are 10 that I particularly liked, and which you might want to start with if you’re interested.

How Pizza Works!

The guys cover the history of pizza is from 17th century Italy, to Italian immigrants setting up pizza shops in New York, Chicago, and Philadelphia, to the Big Pizza industry. Warning: this episode will make you very hungry and very much want pizza.

How Muppets Work

According to Josh and Chuck, this is SYSK’s most popular podcast ever, and understandably so. It’s fascinating stuff, and in fact, inspired me to write a piece on Muppet lingo.

How Jim Henson Worked

This is a really nice companion piece to the above.

How Foot Binding Worked

Learn about when a whole country had a (gross) foot fetish.

How Charles Darwin Worked

Listening to this episode, I realized I didn’t know much about Charles Darwin. When he was in his early 20s, he got invited to accompany this rich dude on his ship and explore exotic lands for five years. Darwin recorded everything he saw, and many years later, that became the Origin of the Species.

He was also very nervous — often throwing up out of anxiety — and so he didn’t enjoy the fame and notoriety associated with his famous work. In addition, he married his first cousin before they knew about the possible negative affects of inbreeding, and when I say “they,” I mean him. Darwin was the one who discovered that while married to his cousin, who by the way was a devout Christian so there was that whole conflict.

What makes a one-hit wonder?

This is a fun episode if mostly because of the walk down ’80s memory lane (remember Kajagoogoo?).

What makes a serial killer?

I’ve always been fascinated by serial killers (although in a guilty way) so this episode was a must-listen for me. Josh and Chuck give some history, describe what distinguishes a serial killer from, say, a mass murderer or a spree killer, and discuss some of the most famous serials killers, including Son of Sam, the Green River killer, and Jeffrey Dahmer.

What’s the deal with Rasputin’s death?

The guys clear up the lore around the death of the “mystical faith healer,” namely that he wasn’t some sort of unkillable vampire. He was a pretty tough mofo though.

Capgras Syndrome: You Are Not Who You Think You Are

Capgras Syndrone is a neurological disorder in which you think your loved ones are imposters. In other words, you see a man who looks like your father, but you feel like he’s just someone wearing a Dad-costume.

This might have something to do with a misfire in the brain causing you to not feel emotion when you see someone you know, which your brain chalks up to, “Must be an imposter.”

Taste and How It Works

The guys talk about taste beyond salty, sweet, bitter, and sour, how taste buds work, and supertasters, that small part of the population who taste certain flavors super-strongly.

Those are just a handful of hundreds of information-packed episodes available. You can get the SYSK podcast via the app, Podcasts. Not all the episodes are available there, but they are all available on their site.

Happy listening!

seattle / travel — Comments Off on Hiking, Softies, and Searching for Mr. Pointy
28
Feb 15

Hiking, Softies, and Searching for Mr. Pointy

Earlier this month I had the chance to visit my college pal Judy in Seattle. Right around this time last year, I went to Seattle for AWP and saw Judy all too briefly. This time, we got to hang out for a whole long weekend.

Rain, Softies, and fry bread

The great thing about Seattle is that the flight from San Francisco is so short: just two hours. Even better when you have an aisle seat in the exit row with no one in the middle (except for my seatmate’s jacket and backapck, go right ahead) and on Virgin. Aw yeah!

I spent the whole time listening to downloads of my new obsession, the Stuff You Should Know podcast (which deserves its own post), and playing Shanghai Mahjong, and before I knew it we were there.

Of course it was raining, but not too much, and Judy was kind enough to pick me up at the airport. The moment we met up, it was non-stop talking. We had a lot to catch up on. Back at her lovely house, we snacked and chatted some more before heading out to nearby Kirkland.

I should say Judy doesn’t live in Seattle itself but a suburb highly populated by “Softies,” or people who work for Microsoft. In my short visit there, I found that Seattle and the surrounding area had a very different tech feeling than the Bay Area. Less start-uppy and more old-school Big Tech. But I could be totally wrong.

It was drizzling as we walked around, but again not too bad. It wasn’t even worth the effort to use an umbrella. Kirkland has a lovely lakefront that was still lovely even in the cloudiness and mist.

For dinner we ended up at a Mexican place, where I tried Native American fry bread for the first time. However, there was so much stuff on it, I couldn’t really tell what it was like. My drink was definitely yummy: a combo of some kind of liquor, ginger beer, and lime.

I can’t remember when we got back. No later than 10, but I had gotten up early that morning, and between the flying and the drink, I was ready to conk out.

The search for Mr. Pointy

We spent the next day walking around downtown Seattle. We did a tiny bit of shopping, then for lunch we had delicious pho, which was perfect for the damp and chilly day. Unfortunately I can’t remember the name of the restaurant. I know: I’m useless.

Then we were off to the EMP/Science Fiction Museum. I’ve been there before but that first time somehow missed the whole science fiction part of it. Needless to say, this time around I was nerding out pretty hard, especially because of the Star Wars costumes exhibit.

But before that there was the “fantasy” section, which included stuff from The Wizard of Oz, The Lord of the Rings, and The Game of Thrones:

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

And of course the Star Wars exhibit was great.

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

But what I was really on the search for was Mr. Pointy. I saw it advertised outside, along with other “horror artifacts.” Obviously the vampire-killing stake Buffy inherited from Kendra wasn’t going to be in the Star Wars section. I walked around the fantasy section twice before poking my head out and asking the young hipster guard, “Is it in here that I would find Mr. Pointy?”

He stared at me blankly.

“You know from Buffy,” I said. Then it hit me. “You have no idea what I’m talking about do you?”

He admitted that he didn’t, and that he had only seen the movie. Then he said that besides the music section, there was just fantasy and Star Wars, and I have to say I was a wee bit disappointed.

Judy and I were walking out when I saw the sign again about the horror exhibit. I had seen signs for it inside too, but for the life of me couldn’t find it.

Judy was kind enough to accompany my obsessed ass back in (although she opted for the museum store instead), and the guard was kind enough to believe me when I said I had just left (having the receipt helped) but completely missed the horror. He gave me a new sticker and pointed me in the right direction.

I love fantasy and SF, but I love horror even more. When I saw that the exhibit was rated PG-13, I was even happier.

I saw the alien from Aliens —

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

— this guy —

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

and — duh duh duh duuuh! — Mr. Pointy:

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

Yup, it’s a stick. But Buffy fans will get the importance of this stick.

I also enjoyed a short video about Ringu and The Exorcist. Eli Roth talked about how when he was six, he was about to watch some scary movie (I forget which), and his father said, “You want to see a scary movie?” and showed him The Exorcist.

“That messed me up for years,” Roth said.

When I was nine, I had a similar experience, which I’ve tried writing about before but not yet to my satisfaction. Maybe it’s time to try it again.

After I was done, I found Judy in the cafe, and after downing a refreshing apple soda, we headed back.

That night we had dinner at home, then checked out a winery not too far away. We thought it was going to be a wine tasting, but it wasn’t. It was just wine, bad music, and worse dancing.

I kind of wished I had Mr. Pointy then.

Hiking

The next day we went hiking, which was super-fun.

The last time I went hiking was in college or high school. We were on a family trip in Yosemite. It was me, my dad, and my brother (my mother wisely decided to opt out), and it was August. In other words, hot. For some reason Greg had all the water, and since he was on cross country, effortlessly jogged all the way up to the top. He met me and my father — sweating and huffing and puffing — on the way down, and at that point we gave up.

This hike was much easier, partly because I’m in better shape but also because it was cloudy and cool, and I had plenty of water and snacks.

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

 

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

The hike was about four miles total, and was actually easier than my walk back from the grocery store at home. In that case I’m carrying up to 10 pounds of groceries uphill in the sun. Doing that a few times a month for several months has been good practice.

After our hike, we had a delicious barbecue lunch at a place nearby called Rhodies Smoking BBQ.

A photo posted by actung9 (@actung9) on

After we got back, we pretty much just bummed around for the rest of the day. Had leftovers for dinner, then started to watch a movie. But neither of us were too into it, and I was pretty tired. The next morning I flew back to San Francisco.

I may visit Seattle again before my move back to the east coast. It’s so close and the flight prices don’t seem to change much. Plus I’d love to go hiking — and eat barbecue — again.

food / san francisco — Comments Off on Living alone and liking it: Weekend haunts
03
Jan 15

Living alone and liking it: Weekend haunts

I’ve mentioned before this past year has been the first time I’ve really been on my own in a city where I don’t know too many people. So I’ve had to learn a whole new level of independence.

Part of that is developing my own routines. During the work week it’s easy. I go to work, I come home, I work out (sometimes). Weekends and holidays are more of a challenge. Sure, I write and hit the gym, but that doesn’t take the whole day.

While I’m sure Oakland has a lot to offer, what I’ve been doing is going into San Francisco to tool around, even if just for a few hours.

Getting there

I’m one of those weird people (weird at least in California) who doesn’t have a car. So what I do is walk the 2+ miles to the BART station. Going there isn’t bad since it’s all downhill, but that means of course it’s uphill coming back, and I usually have a backpack of heavy groceries. At least it’s really good exercise.

Westfield San Francisco Centre

It probably seems ridiculous to come here when I have all of SF to explore. But it’s easy to get to from the BART, it has some good food, and you know what they say: you can take the girl out of the mall, but you can’t take the mall out of the girl.

I’ll usually get lunch at Ajisen Ramen, which is a chain but still pretty good:

After running some errands, I might treat myself to a red velvet ice cream from Cako (delish) and get reflective at the reflecting pool at the Yerba Buena Arts Center,  which I’ve mentioned is one of my favorite places in SF:

Japantown

Another one of my favorite SF haunts. For lunch I like to eat at either Suzu Noodle House or New Korea House:

New Korea House is a little overpriced, but at least you get all those yummy sides and delicious sujeonggwa, a kind of cold cinnamon drink, afterward.

Another one of my favorite Japantown hangouts is YakiniQ Cafe. They have free wifi so it’s a great place to work, although it does get jampacked on the weekends. Their macarons are pretty but meh. I do however love their honey yuzu tea. So refreshing, especially after salty bowl of ramen or mandu guk.

Sometimes when I’m feeling extra generous, I’ll treat myself to a movie at the Sundance Kabuki. It’s my favorite theater in the Bay Area, between the reserved seating, nice environment, gourmet level snacks, and quality movies.

year-end retrospects — 2 comments
31
Dec 14

2014 in Retrospect

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I can’t believe it was only last year that MB and I broke up. True, we broke up in the beginning of 2013 and now 2014 is basically over so it’s more like two years, but it feels even longer than that, I suppose because so much has happened and changed since then.

Travel

I went to a whole bunch of places this year.

I kicked things off with a super-fun Presidents’ Day vacation in sunny (yet chilly) Orlando with YP and a college pal (and of course we hit Disney), and then AWP again at the end of February, this time in Seattle, where I participated in a reading with Bellingham Review and had the chance to catch up with a college buddy I haven’t seen in years.

April meant another birthday trip to NJ and NYC; August was the big Spain trip; Thanksgiving, a nice long visit on the east coast; and just last week, a visit with Greg and his girlfriend in Los Angeles.

I’m not sure yet what my travel plans will be for 2015. I have no plans to go to AWP. (I’m not working nor have I been invited to any readings.) I had been thinking I’d go to NJ and NYC again for my birthday, but now I’m considering someplace else. Japan is at the top of  my list and — I just thought of this — maybe Montreal or Prince Edward Island. Greg raved about Montreal, and PEI because of Anne of Green Gables.

Writing

The biggest project I completed in the last year or so was my paranormal teen romance.

I had had the idea for a while, but thought I should revise this other novel I had completed in December of 2012 although I hated it. Every single word was a struggle to write. In all honestly, I probably should have given up on it long ago instead of wasting time and energy.

After MB and I broke up, I couldn’t work on that book. For a while I did nothing, then finally decided, Fuck it, I want to work on something fun and new, and started the YA book.

It was a pleasure to write from start to finish. When I wasn’t writing, I missed my characters. I got tingles imagining some scenes. I was always excited to work on it.

I have such good memories of working on it too. In Paris I was jetlagged so I’d be awake at four in the morning. I’d make some coffee and eat chocolate and write in my notebook while YP slept in the next room and it rained outside.

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I would like those kinds of mornings for the rest of my life.

I finished the novel in March of this year. I spent a month revising it, then queried a whole bunch of agents. No luck. Needless to say, I was really disappointed. I loved the book so much, and everyone I talked to got excited about the premise. I wanted to make the book better but didn’t know how.

Then my brother read it and gave me an excellent critique. Basically, he said, it’s more like a first draft. There are a lot of lost opportunities for “coolness” and imaginative stuff. Perhaps a red herring I set up isn’t necessary, and, most of all, the protagonist is dull. I tried hard not to make her passive, but I think in the end she’s too much like me, and so, as always, I wasn’t able to get enough distance to make her her own person.

After hearing all that, I thought, Of course! It’s all so obvious! Duh!!!

I’m not quite ready yet to start revising it, but I’ve been thinking about it a lot. When I’m ready to work on it again, I know I won’t be able to help it.

In addition to my book, I published a number of short pieces on everything from language to libraries to the television show Hannibal. For 2015, I plan on more of the same, as well as, perhaps, getting back into personal essays.

Health & Fitness

I probably didn’t achieve as much in the fitness area of my life. Sometime I last year I gave up going to classes at my krav maga place. While the location was super-convenient for where I used to live, it’s just not anymore. So when my membership expired in September of last year, I didn’t bother renewing it.

Instead I joined a gym near work and it’s fantastic. Clean and spacious with gorgeous locker rooms and Kiehl’s in the showers. So while I don’t do harder workouts now like conditioning and carido punching bag, I’ve been going more consistently — four or five days during the week, whether early in the morning, at lunchtime, or after work.

I do miss those conditioning and punching bag classes though, especially since I hurt my back a couple of weeks ago. Walking and even running were okay, but sitting was excruciating, especially on a jerky bus ride. My theory is that because I stopped conditioning and punching bag, my back and core muscles have weakened. At the same time, I started rowing in the last several months, probably with bad form, and have been carrying around a heavy backpack quite a lot, whether during my travels, to and from work with my computer and other gadgets, or grocery shopping.

If my back feels better soon, I’ll try to take this conditioning class I like at the gym. I’ve taken it several times but stopped because it’s not until 5:30 and I get home so late. But how I’ll fill the punching bag shaped hole in my heart, I’m not sure. I sometimes work on the heavy bag at the gym, but it’s not the same as a solid hour of doing routines and conditioning. I’m almost tempted to rejoin my old krav maga gym, maybe for six months or so.

In other health news, since April I’ve cut out instant noodles and other high sodium processed foods. I’m paranoid about my blood pressure (I know, I know, I should get a checkup). Also because of what I’m theorizing is low stomach acid, I’ve cut my rice intake as well. If I eat too much rice or other carbs, my stomach feels like it’s going to explode (however, that didn’t stop me this past week from eating delicious stuffing, noodles, and sandwiches).

I’ve also started eating more fruits and vegetables, and gotten into the habit of having an apple or whatever is in season after lunch and dinner. I feel like the fruit neutralizes any saltiness and probably helps with digestion as well.

Family

My dad’s health has been up and down for the past couple of years. In late 2012, he had a bad fall during a vacation in Taiwan, and ever since then has dealt with a variety of issues.

When I saw him in April, he seemed to be improving. He was sleeping better and had a good appetite. But when Greg saw him over the summer, he was in bad shape. His doctor had him on strong antibiotics in preparation for a biopsy that could lead to possible infection. As a result, he had lost his appetite and was eating almost nothing.

Greg said he was really skinny, could barely keep his balance, and seemed really muddled. On top of that, he was having trouble sleeping again (he was worried about his biopsy results, which by the way turned out fine) and was on some sleep aid, which made him crazy, especially in combination with this appetite stimulant he was on. AND on top of all that, he had a cataract he was being stubborn about so he couldn’t see either.

Now he’s like a new person.

As soon as he was off the antibiotics, he got his appetite back. I had suggested eating yogurt and sweet potatoes to help with his digestion. He resisted at first, saying that yogurt was too sour and just not digging sweet potatoes, but now he eats both multiple times a day.

He got the cataract removed at the end of August, and now he’s reading and typing intelligent emails again. Before, his emails were crazy. I didn’t know if he couldn’t see or was, like, losing it. Now they’re back to being eloquent.

He still can’t walk as much as he used to, but he still takes short walks a couple of times a day, and goes to physical therapy. He started playing mah-jongg again and singing karaoke. He goes out to dinner with friends.

When I told Greg that, he couldn’t believe it.

Finally selling their house also helped. It was a huge worry for them. But now it’s off their hands and they’re settling in their new place in an independent living development (ie, a retirement community).

When I first saw the new house last month, it was weird. It was as though my parents were living in some stranger’s home, and the idea of some other kid living in my old room also weirded me out. But I got used to the new place fast. It helps that the upstairs is almost like its own apartment, complete with two bedrooms, a bathroom off one of the bedrooms, and a living room.

“You could live here!” ES said when I gave her the tour.

Yeah, a 40+ single woman living in her parents’ retirement community. Pretty pathetic (and possibly a rom-com).

While my father is doing much better, I doubt he’ll be up for visiting me before I move. However, I’m glad my mom had the chance to come out here last October. She came for my aunt and uncle’s anniversary party (they live in San Jose), and stayed with me one weekend. We mostly hung around the apartment although we did go into Oakland Chinatown, have dim sum, and pick up stuff for dumplings, which I had wheedled her into making for me.

During that time I also had the chance to see lots of extended family because of my aunt and uncle’s party (after which I got sick because of one glass of wine and a very winding car ride back to the house).

Moving

After MB and I broke up, I couldn’t afford to stay in our Nob Hill apartment anymore and moved into a friend’s condo in Oakland.

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While there’s no denying the apartment is fabulous and the area beautiful, living not-in-a-city was a huge adjustment for me. After five years of living in Manhattan and three and a half in very walkable Nob Hill, I was used to having everything I needed within walking distance and to be able to pop out for food or just to get out.

You can’t really do that here. If you have a car, that’s another story, but I’m phobic about driving so that wasn’t an option for me. I have to admit at first I felt somewhat isolated. Walking into town and to the BART is doable but it does take a lot of time. And I hated the idea of paying for so many cab rides.

However, a year and a half later, I’ve gotten used to it. It helps that I’ve started taking a different walking route into town. The one I used to take was on the highway for quite a bit and went through this part of town with steep hills. The new one doesn’t go through any pretty developments, but it’s sidewalks all the way down and only a gradual hill. I’m not sure why I took my previous route for so long.

So now I’m a lot less hesitant about doing what I call the schlep. Plus it’s good exercise. Ever since Spain and marathon walking days, I’ve really been into these super long walks.

Despite my love for this apartment and the Bay Area weather, I’ll be moving back to the east coast next summer. There are many reasons. I have lots of friends on the east coast, I’ll be able to afford to live in a city (Manhattan rents are currently cheaper than San Francisco’s), and I’ll be nearer to my parents who, let’s face it, aren’t getting any younger. Plus the east coast just feels more like home.

I will miss the weather and my huge apartment though. Shit.

 

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